So while at my aunts house for New Years, I took a little nap because ive been so tired.
So I wake up like 20 minutes later, to my brother saying something to me.
He says "Chino doesnt love you. Oscar loves you. You will marry Oscar."
It was so depressing. Like what even?
On the car ride to my Aunts house, we started talking about him too.
I told then about how I officially stopped caring about him.
My mom told me I was stupid and that i'd regret it soon.
My brother said "well if you ask me he's been your best boyfriend. I liked him."
I'm so tired of not even knowing.
Like jngdhxnbdgk
Forget life.
I wish life was a game and i could just hit the quit button whenever I wanted to.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Last Night.
It could have been better.
Let me explain.
My boyfriend, my friend Emily, and I went out to the movies last night to watch Sherlock Homes.
Emily and I are as close as best friends could get. I've never really had a best friend but Emily is defiantly my definition of one. Anyways so we went out to the movies and it was so good to finally see my boyfriend after about two weeks.
While at the movies Emily was talking about going out to see this guy she likes after the movies.
I was totally down Well it turns out the movie was much longer than expected so in order to be home before she breaks curfew, we had to leave the movie early. I felt so terrible.
So we set out for this guys house and when we get there, we literally sit out there for about 30 minutes before we have to go up to the door and ring the doorbell. Who opens? His mom. Where's this boy? "He's sleeping." She likes him so much it worries me that she'll make up excuses for him.
So I'm going to make a pros and cons list of last night to help sort my brain out.
PROS:
Let me explain.
My boyfriend, my friend Emily, and I went out to the movies last night to watch Sherlock Homes.
Emily and I are as close as best friends could get. I've never really had a best friend but Emily is defiantly my definition of one. Anyways so we went out to the movies and it was so good to finally see my boyfriend after about two weeks.
While at the movies Emily was talking about going out to see this guy she likes after the movies.
I was totally down Well it turns out the movie was much longer than expected so in order to be home before she breaks curfew, we had to leave the movie early. I felt so terrible.
So we set out for this guys house and when we get there, we literally sit out there for about 30 minutes before we have to go up to the door and ring the doorbell. Who opens? His mom. Where's this boy? "He's sleeping." She likes him so much it worries me that she'll make up excuses for him.
So I'm going to make a pros and cons list of last night to help sort my brain out.
PROS:
- I saw Emily
- I saw Juan (boyfriend)
- Had a good time at the movies
- He gave me butterflies
- Went on an actual adventure
- Broke curfew by a few minutes for the first time ever.
- Stayed in an empty house
- Stayed up til four watching the blind side <3
CONS:
- Got lost
- Had to leave movies early.
- Went to a random guys house at 9 at night only to have the door answered by his mom
- It was cold
I suppose overall it was a goodnight. Reguardless of how the night went, I still adore both of these kids with so much of my heart(: They keep me sane <3
Saturday, December 24, 2011
Christmas.
The magic of Christmas rubbed off a long time ago.
In fact, it was December 19th, 2006 i believe when Christmas started being just another day to me.
It was the last day of fourth grade for the semester and we were having a party.
My principal came in and told us about how one of our classmates had died.
She was my best friend.
After that, Christmas never seemed the same.
There was no excitement for opening presents or waking up early.
It was simply just another day.
This year is no exception.
There were a couple of things I wanted before going back to school on the 4th.
Last night I brought them all up to my mom.
She laughed at all of them and said no.
There was only one that she said "we'll go back to that one later"
Which in her world means "No, so dont ask me again."
For the most part they were simple things such as dying my hair, taking vitamins, buying a puppy, and getting glasses.
I'm just ready for all of this to go away.
Actually, I say that because im jealous of the 5 year olds who think Santa's trying to sneak around the house when they're sleeping.
Or how staying up til midnight was the toughest thing to do, but you'd do anything to open your presents.
But today, and tomorrow will be just another day for me.
In fact, it was December 19th, 2006 i believe when Christmas started being just another day to me.
It was the last day of fourth grade for the semester and we were having a party.
My principal came in and told us about how one of our classmates had died.
She was my best friend.
After that, Christmas never seemed the same.
There was no excitement for opening presents or waking up early.
It was simply just another day.
This year is no exception.
There were a couple of things I wanted before going back to school on the 4th.
Last night I brought them all up to my mom.
She laughed at all of them and said no.
There was only one that she said "we'll go back to that one later"
Which in her world means "No, so dont ask me again."
For the most part they were simple things such as dying my hair, taking vitamins, buying a puppy, and getting glasses.
I'm just ready for all of this to go away.
Actually, I say that because im jealous of the 5 year olds who think Santa's trying to sneak around the house when they're sleeping.
Or how staying up til midnight was the toughest thing to do, but you'd do anything to open your presents.
But today, and tomorrow will be just another day for me.
Sunday, December 18, 2011
The Rules of a Gentleman
So a friend of mine sent me this blog
THIS ONE.
And All day i've been reading all of the rules.
And it made me realize.
My boyfriend is so good to me.
I know im young, and this is probably only young love,
and will never be anything more,
but i really like it.
He treats me so well and it's so different than all of my past relationships. I actually really like him :3
I used to play this game with an old friend, its called secretly. Ever since we stopped talking ive had no one to play with (lol pathetic :3) so im gonna play it here (: (lolol even more pathetic)
Secretly, I think I am truly falling for this boy <3
I trust him with everything I have. In fact, I'm writing him a list of all the things he doesnt know about me. All the secrets I hide from the rest of the world. I'm nervous to give it to him, but at the same time I'm ready(:
Theres so many things I wish i could tell him to his face but im so scared for rejection, even from a boy that ive been with for three months already. I'm scared to tell him I love him, and scared to tell him how much he means to me. And when he asks about my past? My heart aches of fear that he will deny me for the rest of time. I've never worried about these things before. EVER. with any guy. If it were any other guy, i wouldnt even have to worry about telling them, I wouldnt care. But this guy, hes special. He's very different. He is, Mine <3
THIS ONE.
And All day i've been reading all of the rules.
And it made me realize.
My boyfriend is so good to me.
I know im young, and this is probably only young love,
and will never be anything more,
but i really like it.
He treats me so well and it's so different than all of my past relationships. I actually really like him :3
I used to play this game with an old friend, its called secretly. Ever since we stopped talking ive had no one to play with (lol pathetic :3) so im gonna play it here (: (lolol even more pathetic)
Secretly, I think I am truly falling for this boy <3
I trust him with everything I have. In fact, I'm writing him a list of all the things he doesnt know about me. All the secrets I hide from the rest of the world. I'm nervous to give it to him, but at the same time I'm ready(:
Theres so many things I wish i could tell him to his face but im so scared for rejection, even from a boy that ive been with for three months already. I'm scared to tell him I love him, and scared to tell him how much he means to me. And when he asks about my past? My heart aches of fear that he will deny me for the rest of time. I've never worried about these things before. EVER. with any guy. If it were any other guy, i wouldnt even have to worry about telling them, I wouldnt care. But this guy, hes special. He's very different. He is, Mine <3
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Everything Will Be Okay(:
I always tell myself everything will be okay.
I know it will. Eventually.
A friend of mine is going through a very tough heartbreak that is similar to one I had a while back.
I only wish I knew how to get over it back then. Heartbreaks are never easy, but I wish I knew all the shortcuts to fixing them.
Right now, Im dating a really amazing guy. Even though most times I act like I dont care, its because im protecting myself. I'm not letting it happen again. The last guy hurt so bad that even a year later, some days I just cant help but cry because of it, I dont even have feelings for the guy. Its all just the memories and the pain that I went through.
My point in this, is that I know us teenage girls, and I know our hearts are so fragile, but the boy who just hurt you is just one boy. I promise you that one day you'll look back and thank this boy for what he taught you. One day the boy whos worth it will walk into your life and you'll know it. Hes going to love you for who you are. You're going to love him for who he is, and how he treats you, and how he treats your family, and your friends, and because hes tall, dark, and handsome :3 I dont care if you love him because hes a football player. Just know that you love him, and i mean truly love him.
If you're having a bad day, guess what? I HAVE ADVICE FOR YOU TOO(:
Times seem tough right now, and i hate to sound so cliche, but things will get better i promise you. Always remember, The Grass Is Always Greener. YOU have it so much better than someone right now. Even if you feel like your life is worthless and you feel like giving up, remember someone has it worse. I wish we all had the answers to all of our questions, but thats the point of life, its to find them on our own by going through all these different experiences and living through our answers.
So i really hope this helped at least one person feel better to some degree. Just always remember that there is SOMEONE out there who truly loves you, so dont be afraid to take chances. <3
I know it will. Eventually.
A friend of mine is going through a very tough heartbreak that is similar to one I had a while back.
I only wish I knew how to get over it back then. Heartbreaks are never easy, but I wish I knew all the shortcuts to fixing them.
Right now, Im dating a really amazing guy. Even though most times I act like I dont care, its because im protecting myself. I'm not letting it happen again. The last guy hurt so bad that even a year later, some days I just cant help but cry because of it, I dont even have feelings for the guy. Its all just the memories and the pain that I went through.
My point in this, is that I know us teenage girls, and I know our hearts are so fragile, but the boy who just hurt you is just one boy. I promise you that one day you'll look back and thank this boy for what he taught you. One day the boy whos worth it will walk into your life and you'll know it. Hes going to love you for who you are. You're going to love him for who he is, and how he treats you, and how he treats your family, and your friends, and because hes tall, dark, and handsome :3 I dont care if you love him because hes a football player. Just know that you love him, and i mean truly love him.
If you're having a bad day, guess what? I HAVE ADVICE FOR YOU TOO(:
Times seem tough right now, and i hate to sound so cliche, but things will get better i promise you. Always remember, The Grass Is Always Greener. YOU have it so much better than someone right now. Even if you feel like your life is worthless and you feel like giving up, remember someone has it worse. I wish we all had the answers to all of our questions, but thats the point of life, its to find them on our own by going through all these different experiences and living through our answers.
So i really hope this helped at least one person feel better to some degree. Just always remember that there is SOMEONE out there who truly loves you, so dont be afraid to take chances. <3
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